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Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, in this post you will be presented with the facts that overwhelmingly conclude beyond the shadow of a doubt that this standing desk is guilty… of being incredibly useful. We call to the stand our first witness. In an effort to protect her anonymity, we will call her ‘A Federal Government Attorney Working in Detroit.’ So, Mrs. A Federal Government Attorney Working in Detroit, are you familiar with this standing desk, and if so, has it been of use?

This is a waste of time. When you called me in as an expert witness in my field, I didn’t realize it would be to testify in a mock trial about how my workspace has been improved by this wonderful 30″d x 48″w x 40″h desktop. Sure, the polyurethane casters allow me to load the desk up with tons of heavy Law Books and still roll it to any convenient location in my building, but I have cases to try. I don’t have time for this nonsense.”

So you’re saying it IS useful! Aha! Made with casters? I believe we have a picture of this. Members of the jury, we would like to submit a photo of this desk caught in the act of being useful, which we will now refer to as Exhibit A.

Exhibit A 

Do you deny that you are utilizing this raised tabletop to write legal briefs on the fly while referencing materials that are stored on that floating shelf below?

“Who’s denying it? I just told you that the work desk has made my life easier. I’m on my feet all day, I don’t have time to settle in at my office desk. Also, you’re a terrible prosecutor; Exhibit A should be inadmissible on the grounds that you don’t know what you’re talking about. That’s no floating shelf, it’s a cantilever shelf. It only attaches to two posts, leaving open space in the front for easy access and a clean finish.”

 Ma’am, please stick to the subject at hand. Exhibit A proves that you’re using this tabletop to the fullest extent possible. Clearly you are an accomplice. Just admit it, tell us how you did it. Out with it, confess already!

“Alright! Alright. It was easy. I just went to theshelvingstore.com and ordered a 30″d x 48″w wire shelf, put a note in to get some 44″ round posts custom cut to 40″, added that cantilever shelf I mentioned along with those casters, and bought some wire shelf liners to create a desktop.”

But how do you keep it so stable while it’s rolling around?

“That’s the easiest part! Hanger rails. They were with me from the start. I couldn’t have done it without them.”

I think we’ve heard enough. Judge, care to weigh in?

Yes, I think I’ve heard enough. I’m getting one!

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